Enough is Enough?

A number of my clients are reminding me of how difficult it is to experience a sense of “enoughness.”

“When I’m thin enough, then I’ll be happy...”

“When I have enough money, I’ll stop worrying...”

“I’m not attractive enough to go there...”

“There’s never enough food to satisfy me...”

“When I’ve had enough of my eating disorder, I’ll stop...”

An insightful client once remarked that “Binge” stands for Because I’m Not Good Enough.

Have you had enough misery? Does recovery matter enough for you to get well? When is enough really enough?  How do you go about feeling like enough of a person? What if the feeling of enough never arrives?

As I’m writing this, I’m having difficulty articulating my thoughts. This is a difficult concept to grab hold of. My feeling is that there’s something dialectical is at work here: perhaps, in order to walk the path of recovery, you need to accept that the thoughts “there is never enough of life” but “I am always enough as a human being” can exist simultaneously in your mind.

If you’re turning to food to cope with your emotions and non-hunger needs, there will never be enough to satisfy you. If, as you’re bingeing, you’re telling yourself “this is the very last time ever that I will eat this,” there will not be enough to satisfy you.

Maybe, then, “enough” is a decision based on values, not a feeling. You can have enough chocolate today, because you know you can have some more tomorrow. You can feel satisfied with yourself and your life today, because you’ve taken steps to connect with your values and reach your goals.

Enough already. I’d welcome your comments on this concept. Email me at: This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

With Love,

Ellen