Surviving The Holidays

'tis the season to be stressed out?

It seems that everyone is way too busy in December. If you're a student or teacher, you have final projects and exams; if you're a parent, you have concerts, gift-buying, decorating, cooking, baking, and a thousand other tasks, and if you have an eating disorder or an emotional problem like depression or anxiety, all the "must-do's" over the next month seem that much more stressful. I feel my anxiety rising as I write these sentences! This is probably going to be my last blog post until the new year. Because I like thinking about what I want to communicate to you through cyberspace, and I don't want it to become one more thing I feel I "should" do, I'm going to take it off my perpetually full to-do list and start afresh in 2010. Meanwhile, here are a few thoughts on surviving the holidays.

Don't spend more than you can afford, and don't assume that everyone you know is expecting a fancy gift from you. Sometimes, just letting someone know you're thinking about them with a card is enough. There is more than one "right" way to be generous with your love, and you don't need to be perfect.

Practice gratitude. So what if you mother buys you an outfit two sizes too big, or too small, or in sickly beige. Or maybe you were hoping for an iPhone and got chocolate instead. You may feel misunderstood, but isn't it nice that someone made an effort for you? Others don't need to be perfect either.

Keep yourself nourished, hydrated, exercised, and rested. You don't need to prepare for a party by starving yourself all day; that's usually a sure-fire way to trigger a binge. And you don't need to avoid social situations where there will be loads of food. Have you ever turned down an invitation only to end up bingeing by yourself? It's terribly depressing. Get dressed, get out, engage in conversation and try not to focus on what is being served. Give yourself permission to eat if you're hungry. Don't if you're not. Try to have some fun - I bet you deserve it.

Watch your shoulds, stay present-centered, and try to identify the irrational self-statements that lead you to feeling upset or out of sorts -- this is good advice for every day, not just the holidays.

Wishing you a minimally stressful, maximally happy and healthy holiday season --

Ellen