Weighing In

I have a few new clients who are having a hard time giving up their scales. They weigh themselves first thing in the morning, last thing at night, and if they have the time, throughout the day. What is it that is so compelling about that particular bathroom accessory? Why does the information it provides weigh so heavily (pun intended) on our consciousness? How is it that it can so effectively determine one’s self-worth?

Looking to the scale for reassurance is a hallmark of eating disorder behavior, and in this sense, there are some interesting parallels between eating disorders and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). There are a number of manifestations of OCD, an anxiety disorder characterized by persistent, intrusive thoughts (Am I clean enough? Am I safe enough? Did I do something wrong?) and ritualized behaviors meant to neutralize the anxiety caused by the thoughts (washing, checking, counting, ordering). For many, stepping on the scale is the compulsive response to anxiety-provoking questions such as “Who am I? How should I feel about myself today? What did I do to myself yesterday? Was I good or bad? Am I being punished? Who will I be today?”

It took me many years to realize that the scale never did and never will answer any of those questions.  Goodness and badness are not determined by the number on a scale or the size of one’s jeans, nor is it dependent on the quality or quantity of food you consume from one day to the next. Feeling good about one’s self comes from being positively engaged in life – having meaningful relationships, work, and creative pursuits, and by being open to new experiences. Can these things really be measured on a scale?

You are much more than a number of pounds. Lose the scale. Find your true self.

Ellen