"forget winning - Cultivate Delight"

This past weekend, I had the pleasure of participating in my quilters’ guild’s biannual show. The event was made that much more exciting for me (as exciting as a quilt show can get), because my very first submission from two years ago, a quilt I named “In Honour of Sis,” was displayed on this year’s publicity poster. I was very proud to see it all over town in the month preceding the show. While bringing over my two pieces for this year’s event, I fantasized about the accolades I would receive this year, the ribbons I would win, and the excitement I would share with my friends and family regarding my victory and validated artistic prowess.

The wheels of my reverie came to a screeching halt when I saw my guildmates’ exquisite creations and superior workmanship. There was no way I was going to go home with anything – which is exactly what happened. But I learned – or, rather, relearned – an important lesson about expectations, disappointment, and the necessity of checking one’s ego at the door and leaving it where it belongs. As Diane Ackerman, one of my very favorite authors wrote about trying to tame her unruly garden -- "forget winning - cultivate delight." I try to apply these words of wisdom to most of my life's pursuits.

I create quilts because it is deeply satisfying on many levels: I love bringing an internally visualized concept to external fruition, I find all the many tasks of fabric manipulation, cutting, and sewing, to be challenging in a positive way, and the entire process can be very meditative and calming. And when I give a beautiful blanket as a gift, it's like giving someone I love warm hugs for eternity. I like that. When I receive a photo and see my quilt in the background, I feel loved -- and that's worth a thousand blue ribbons to me.

Giving really is better than receiving, and true gratification is found in process, rather than product. The reward we get from creating and acting in accordance with our values means much more than the awards we may receive from some external source. I appreciate having had the opportunity to remind myself of these truisms yet again.

Today, let’s choose to validate ourselves.